Search This Blog

Friday, May 27, 2016

Why The Mormon Church Does Not Support Gay Marriage

Recently a friend expressed to me, “What is the big deal? Why can’t The Church support gay marriage? Live and let live is a kinder approach to life, anyway, isn’t it?”

I have given this a lot of thought and here is my response to my friend and anyone else who may ask the same question.

There are three basic doctrines central to Mormonism, and in order to understand the Church’s position on any political or social issue, it is critical to understand these three doctrines, as they will always guide any decision made.

1.     At the very core of the doctrine of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons) is the belief that we are literal spiritual offspring of Heavenly Parents, (a mother and a father), and our highest purpose on this earth is to prove ourselves worthy to become like Them.  “Like Them” means having a marriage that lasts throughout eternity where husband and wife become like God, have their own spirit children and help those children become as their parents are.  That is God’s work. It is His purpose. It is His glory. (See Moses 1:39)

2.     Jesus Christ is our literal spirit brother and the Only Begotten of God the Father in the flesh. Christ’s Atonement is so vast, so powerful, and so complete that it allows every single person who has ever lived on this earth to literally be resurrected. And for those who prove themselves worthy, it also provides the way for them to obtain the power, knowledge, wisdom and perfection necessary to become like our Heavenly Parents.

3.     The vast power of the Atonement is available through sacred ordinances and covenants with Jesus Christ. The authority to administer those ordinances and validate those covenants was given to Joseph Smith through angelic ministers. Joseph Smith, as in days of old, was called by God to be His prophet, and the authority to govern Christ’s church has been passed down from Joseph Smith until Thomas S. Monson today.

So now to specifically answer the question . . .

Since Eternal Marriage and Eternal Parenthood are our highest goals, any practice or belief that hinders or prevents a person from reaching that goal can never be supported by the Mormon Church. The Church will never support something that is in direct opposition to its most core doctrine.

Based on that doctrine, the most fundamental reason to not support gay marriage is simply because two people of the same gender cannot procreate. Without the power of procreation, God’s purpose (that of helping His children progress), identity (that of a father) and glory (His glory increases as He helps his children obtain what He has) would cease to exist. (Moses 1:39)

Please take a minute and think about that. 

But if you still don't believe, then perhaps your next question will be, “Isn’t that doctrine discriminatory and hateful?”

If it were only gay marriage then perhaps that might be true. But remember the Church will not support any belief or practice that prevents a person from reaching their full potential. Gay marriage is only one of many practices that stop people from progressing toward Godhood.

An Invitation to Everyone . . .
The gospel of Jesus Christ is an open invitation to all mankind everywhere to “Come unto Christ and be perfected in Him.” (Moroni 10:32) For it is in becoming perfected, in other words, becoming like our Heavenly Parents, that true joy and happiness will be found. Inviting people everywhere to come and partake of that joy, is not hateful. It is God’s plan for His children.

The invitation also does not discriminate.  It does not matter your color, your creed, body shape, social position, marital status, or gender preference.  It does not matter what sins you have or crimes you may have committed. The invitation is an invitation to everyone to come and worship together. We are all God’s children and He loves us all! And he invites us to come to Him just as we are.

This invitation is so vast, and taken so seriously that each year thousands of young men and women, and senior couples, at their own expense, leave the comfort of their homes to journey to other towns and far away lands to extend the invitation to any who will listen.

The invitation is so inclusive that every person who dies without having received a personal invitation to follow Christ and become as He and our Heavenly Parents are, will be given that invitation in the next life. And through proxy ordinances done in temples across the world, those people will have the opportunity to accept or reject the work done in their behalf.

But remember, the invitation is to Come Unto Christ and be perfected in Him. God never intended us to remain just as we are. He always intended us to change. He always intended us to become perfect—to become as He is. 

So come now. Come just as you are. But come ready to change, because in perfection we receive our greatest happiness and in Godhood we receive our deepest joy. And that happiness and joy is what our Heavenly Father wants to give all of us.

Now to those who may reject the invitation and the doctrine, I ask you this,
Is there a better plan out there?

Is there a plan that places a greater value on mankind? Is there a plan that gives us greater potential than Godhood? Is there a plan that offers more hope and more peace than eternal families?

If you can believe just a little, your next question might be, “If it is all true, then why am I like I am?”

The answer lies in the words of Christ Himself. “. . . I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” (Ether 12:27)

Every one of us falls much short of perfection. But imperfections, weaknesses, and challenges are some of the ways God has given us to help us realize our need for the Savior. And as we turn our hearts toward Christ, and apply His Atonement in our lives through covenant, we can receive the power to overcome.

Some of you may now ask, “But what if I don’t want an eternal family?”

Then you don’t have to have one. Agency has always been a guiding principle of the gospel. Those who reject the invitation to change their life, enter into sacred covenants and become like their Heavenly Parents, will not be forced to do so.  But the full blessings of the gospel and the fullness of joy are reserved for those who are willing to do all that God asks them to do. And the purpose of the Church is to help each of us be obedient to God.  

Because . . .

That is God’s plan for happiness. That is God’s plan of love.

Lori Wagner
One Mormon Voice

If you want to read more about Mormon belief on life after this life or same sex attraction, you can do so by clicking on the links below.


  1. Lori, thank you. What a good explanation to the question from your friend.

  2. Thank you Lori. This subject can be very confusing for so many people both in the church and out of the church. Your insight on this topic is thought provoking and will hopefully help others understand why we feel the way we do. It has nothing to do with having ill feelings for or discriminating against those who may feel attracted to the same sex, but more about wanting every one of Gods children to have the same opportunities for spiritual progression and development. This ultimately will help us become closer to and more like Him.

  3. Can't be any more clear than this. For those who use the words 'hate' and 'discrimination' as stumbling blocks to prevent a clear understanding of the Great Plan of Happiness, this treatise eliminates the basis of their argument. Well done!

  4. Thank you for your perspective and insight.

  5. Interesting and well written. Thanks for being so succinct.

  6. So people are free to use their free agency to not have children but they can't use their free agency to be gay? Care to share why God created the gays? I'm really curious to know how you explain that.

    1. I did address the question about why God created gays in the blog post. But to read official material by the Mormon Church you can click on the link at the bottom of the post on same gender attraction. As to agency . . . everyone can use their agency to do whatever they want. But we receive blessings according to our actions and the desires of our hearts. When we keep a commandment we receive a blessing. If we don't keep the commandment we don't receive the blessing. Exaltation (God's life) requires that we keep all of God's commandment. However, if we choose not to keep some, then we will receive the blessings of those commandments we chose to keep and not receive the blessings associated with the commandments we chose not to keep--as is explained in the scripture below from the Doctrine and Covenants. But for a further explanation you can go to the official Church website at

      "There is a law, irrevocably decreed in heaven before the foundations of this world, upon which all blessings are predicated—

      And when we obtain any blessing from God, it is by obedience to that law upon which it is predicated. [D&C 130:20–21]

      So of course you can use your agency to be gay. You can choose to do whatever you want. But you only receive the blessings for the commandments you keep.

  7. If procreation is the primary purpose of marriage then those infertile should not marry or be married by the same logic.

    1. Our judgment will be based on both the desires of our hearts and our actions. Those people who enter into a covenant marriage but are not able to have children but desire to have them, as well as those who desire a covenant marriage but never have the opportunity will be judges on their desires and in the next life will be given all the same blessings as those who entered into eternal marriage and raised a family here. Everything needs to be viewed by an eternal perspective. Some blessings do not come in this life but those who live worthy of the blessings will have them in the next life. And that is such a wonderful promise!!